Magickal Circle

Well made it through another Monday! It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood! It’s hot outside too- expected to be in the 90’s today.

We have gotten some new employees at work. One of them is a guy that just graduated from high school who is on a summer internship type thing. He is going to colledge to study to become a minister. From what litter he has said, he is part of a fairly strict church. He doesn’t listen to rock and roll! I think I’d die if I couldn’t listen to music- at least it would feel that way.

Anyway, this guy is really nice and all but I wonder how he might react if he found out I am Pagan. It’s not that I hide it or anything and my closer co-workers know that I am. But I have never really discussed it with my parents either because I don’t know how they might react. My dad might think I am part of a cult or something.

So how do you decide who to tell and who to keep it quiet? I feel that I don’t want to hide who I am but I don’t feel the need to advertise either. I mention it’s a holiday from time to time and they know I am in tune to the phases of the moon.  Some people might make the connection if they know anything about Wicca.

What has been your experience with telling others? Have you come out of the broom closet? I’d be interested to hear how others have dealth with this issue.

I sort of elected myself to write ritual for my group of friends for Beltane, which we will celebrate tonight. I find it confusing how some texts say it is April 30 and some May 1st. I figured it was a good exercise which it did turn out to be as I came up with a generic ritual and you just plug in the one working section for whatever holiday or spell work you wish to do. I learned a lot doing it.

As part of this I read about the Five Dragons of Fire, Air, Earth, Water and Spirit. I found this amusing because I myself own five bearded dragon lizards. Not four, not six, but exactly five. It just seems sort of strange that I have this amount and strangely enough, some of their personalities match. At least I think so.

My one lizard, Spike, she lives in her hammock (suspended in air) and so I feel she represents air. She also tends to fly off of her hammock with incentive of a worm.

Rudy represents fire for no other reason than he is red in color

Rocky represents earth. He is the color of a white rock and black rock and he is calm and grounded. Plus I named him Rocky

Casanova represents water. He loves to soak in the water. He was my first living dragon and went through a long illness. He is doing great and has a new lease on life.

Finally there is Spirit and that means Rosie. She has lots of spirit too. She is my spunkiest dragon hands down and quite a character.

I have to learn a bit more about this but I also think that these lizards are my animal totem. I’m crazy about them and the first one I ever saw I fell in love with. They each have their own house and there is a four story high rise plus Rudy has a tall tank where he can climb.

Anyway, I though I’d share my story about my dragons as I though it was kind of neat. Have a great Beltane.

Gee, I hope that’s the correct way to spell that- Anyway. A friend at work was discussing animal totums with me.  I had mentioned that I hadn’t really figuered out what mine was. She looks at me, in my cube at work, surrounded by pictures of bearded dragons. No, I don’t have one yet. To say nothing about the 5 wonderful live ones I have at home. Yes, I think so!

Finding one it seems has to do with animals that you seem to repeatedly see, and this  particular animal has a significance for you.  This friend let me look at a book of hers which talks about chakras and aligning your chakras with the correct totums.  It seems to boil down to noticing that around you, taking stock in that and learning what you can from that animal. There are things to learn in nature and things that we need to be taught. But these animal can align with the parts of your body where that type of energy is needed.

This is a quite simplistic way of looking at it, but perhaps a start. So much to learn, so little time.  

Something else to think about. So my mind is in a blender…..

I guess maybe I am repeating myself but education is pretty important to me. I know you can’t learn everything from a  book. So what is a solitary practitioner to do? I know from reading that you can consider yourself a high priestest once you have obtained a certain level of knowledge. But who determines this and where do you learn this stuff. I can read a book but I really feel like I am missing something somewhere. Is it just not my time yet? I know this is the path chosen for me, but perhaps it is time to take stock. 

I guess I really need to devise a plan, set goals, give myself some structure. Perhaps I can contact someone who can help guide me. I guess the power thing still makes me nervous too. I don’t want to get in over my head. I have been told by other witches that I have a lot of power so it makes me nervous.

So anyone who can make some suggestions, I’m listening. Perhaps you know of someone who can guide me. Thanks